Tribute to Tyler

Can you tell that he took this picture of himself? He is so amused!


So I have debated about whether or not to blog about this because even though it is pretty much public knowledge that Tyler is moving to Thatcher, it is just a really emotional subject for me. But by his leaving, there are so many aspects of my life that will change that I felt I had to at least try to put into words some of the things that my heart feels when I hear his name...

Little Shit is probably the first words that I think of. :) Tyler and I have really been through the ringer. We are so much alike and sometimes, that makes communicating very difficult. But for the past 8 years, he has been so patient with me as I learn how to be a parent. And despite the fact that we have gone head to head more than once, (thank goodness for door locks) when all is said and done, we have learned that "step mom" and "step son" have no place in our vocabulary. I love Tyler like my own flesh and blood and he pretty much has a personal space in my heart.

I love that Tyler loves life. He lives his life to the fullest taking "no prisoners of regret" as my dad would say. He looks at his mistakes as a means of making him a better person. I love to see him smile and the way that he kind of wrinkles his face when he laughs really hard. He's got a great smile that is contagious and warm. And any of you that know Tyler know that he is funnier than hell. Sometimes inappropriate, but that must be why I secretly love his sense of humor!

He is an AWESOME athlete! It is so fun to watch him play football, basketball, whatever because he makes it look so easy. He has natural ability like his dad and a temper like... well like Tyler! Maybe he got my temper through osmosis!

Tyler's younger siblings love him! He doesn't ever have to say much to them but they are on cloud nine when he compliments them or spends time with them. I can't even talk about the look on Ethan's face today when he realized that Tyler might not ever move back. BROKE MY HEART!

Some of the most spiritual experiences I have had have come as I have prayed about Tyler or fasted as he had gone through struggles. The day that he recognizes his spiritual greatness and his capabilities ... WOW! He teaches me through his example and reminds me that we don't stop making mistakes just because we "grow up"

Basically, in a nutshell, I LOVE THIS BOY! I love my other children too, but I don't think I was prepared for the emptiness I would feel at his being gone. There were days that I wished for distance and space between us. Now that it is here, I don't know what to do with the silence. Between the both of us, it was rarely quiet. Enter Savannah into the equation and you got a whole lot of noise. I guess the good thing is that I will be a little better prepared for him leaving for his mission and for college.

So, Tyler...

for all of the fears you helped me face, for the fights you made me fight, for all the nights I had to wait on you and for all the times I wondered and worried about you, for all of the times I felt disappointed and for the numerous others I was filled with pride, for the times I bored you with lectures... for all the laughing and learning together, for all the funny stories and long, loooooong talks about "whether or not she liked you..." for all the good and all the bad, you have made me a better person because of your presence in my life. I knew when I met you and you were 7 years old that my life would be different because of you. You make me want to be a better mom and make me so proud that you are my son. Know that you are always in my thoughts and prayers. I love you Ty.